prayer coach

image courtesy of Urban Outfitters

My birthday and Christmas have always been hard times for me. Even as a kid I would approach these days with excitement only to feel overwhelmed with sadness on those days. This year on my birthday was no different; I had some fun plans made and my wife and kids who were excited to celebrate with me. Still one thing didn’t go as planned and I had a hard time bouncing back. What is it about these days that make it so hard for me?

Many people have noticed this phenomenon called holiday depression, and while I have seen some good advice to how to cope, there was not much on why it exists other than the stress of the season. Although I do believe that can play into it, I don’t believe that has been what I have experienced. And without knowing why you’re feeling down, you will have a hard time coming out of it.

For me, the issue lies in that I think this time of year will validate me somehow. During this time of thinking of others, someone will think about me in such a way that I will feel significant and valued. It is reminiscent of Charlie Brown hoping to get a Valentine’s Day card. He spends all year thinking nobody likes him, and on Valentine’s Day he thinks that it will all change by receiving a card from the little red haired girl.

Do I spend all year thinking that I am unimportant and have little value? As a kid I definitely felt this way. I’ve gotten better, but there is still times this feels true. I struggle with feeling like I don’t belong. Christmas is a time for family, which validates your belonging. Here are some questions to help you get to the root of your Christmas depression:

Presentation in the Temple by Lodovico Carracci

Kids young and old are currently finishing up their Christmas lists. Growing up, I would look through the big catalogs and circle things I wanted. It would end up being a giant wishlist which rarely included things I REALLY wanted. Now that I’m older, the list is shrinking. This year I would like three things: an iPad, a trip to Italy, and my house paid off.

What is it you really want to get this Christmas? Is it merely a passing whim or a strong desire? What are you actively seeking out? I believe God is looking for people who know what they want.

The Christmas story tells of at least two such people—Simeon and Anna (Luke 2:22-40). They gave themselves to God. Simeon held to the promise of seeing the Messiah before dying, and Anna worshiped the Lord night and day, fasting and praying for close to 60 years. God honored these two by allowing them to see the baby Jesus and gave them as examples to us.

In this world there are many things that can call for your attention. Most of them have no inherant evil. Simeon and Anna made a conscious decision to deny some acceptable choices in order to go after the one thing they really wanted. I believe God is desiring the same from us.

While the desire for Jesus is commendable, 24/7 prayer vigils is not God’s call for everyone. What are the passions God has put on your heart? Do you want to help boys to grow into manhood? Women free of fear? Communities transformed? New businesses created? Find your desire and pursue it. Pray about it. Listen for God’s heart about it. Research it. Find people of with similar interests. And, take steps to see it fulfilled.

St Paul’s Church of Auckland, New Zealand created a beautiful video of children retelling the Christmas story. They have the children playing all the parts except the donkey, which I thought was an amazing touch. Enjoy.

via Church Marketing Sucks

The Bishop’s Wife is one of my favorite Christmas movies. It came out in 1947 starring Cary Grant, David Niven, and Loretta Young. My wife and I just watched again last night and enjoyed the dialogue and what it has to show us about spiritual living.

The movie is about an Episcopal bishop that loses his focus on what is truly important. This loss of focus entrenches him into a religious mindset that changes how he relates to former friends, new ministry relationships and most noticeably, his wife. Through a series of events a stranger, Dudley, comes along and show the bishop’s friends what God is like—loving, kind, and giving. This offends the bishop and leads to anger and frustration.

The movie does a great job showing how those free to love God offend those who are trying to earn God’s favor. This is the same way that Jesus offended the Pharisees. The Pharisees tried very hard to do everything right to get God to bless them. This effort turned to competition with others. The way of a God-follower was to be one of discipline and hard work.

In this movie, Dudley offers life to everyone he meets. He buys the bishop’s wife a hat she wanted, he takes a taxi driver skating in the park, he refills the sherry bottle of the professor many times for appears to only be for the joy of it. Dudley had a way of making everyone feel important, while the bishop was stuck in thinking about himself or the ministry he was working on.

Obviously this is a Christmas movie, so it has a happy ending. The bishop has the light of love re-ignited in his heart, and it ends with a great Christmas sermon, which is transcribed below. If you want to keep the Christmas spirit for a few more days, I encourage you to watch this movie: The Bishop’s Wife.

One of the best things about Christmas is the sense of hope. There are songs about good tidings. Generosity seems to abound. Families and old friends reconnect. People are generally nicer and happier—unless you are Christmas shopping.

All of this seems to be built into the season. Even those without any strong religion gets sucked into the festivities. Movies abound that tug at the hearts strings to believe in the benefits of goodness.

I believe this is the intended purpose of Christmas. The birth of the Christ-child gave us hope (Ephesians 2:12). Hope marinates this time of year because it is the celebration of God in the world. Thank Him for His intervention. Christ has come!

May the love of Christ fill every part of your season that hope may abound.

image courtesy of Scott Schram (modified)
photograph of Christmas play at Grace Christian Church

Christmas is the time of year we remember the birth of Jesus – Emanuel, God with us. Jesus is the wonderful sign that God wants to have relationship with us. He says this is what I am doing, would you like to join me? The Bible teaches that God wants to have an intimate relationship with every person. The offer of this relationship has been made available through Jesus’ birth, life, death, and resurrection. The heart of God made known through Jesus.

I think most Christians forget how odd this desire is. The Creator God wants to make His creation His children. He wants His creation to rule with Him in heaven. He wants to be involved in our lives and be affected by our choices. He wants to enable us through the Holy Spirit to be everything He created us to become. Jesus came that we may have life and life to the full (John 10:10).

I say this because I see too many Christians stopping their approach to God with only the removal of guilt from sin or the ticket to heaven. God invites us to be involved with Him.

Mary is seemingly minding her own business when an angel tells her that she will give birth to God. She will not have had relations with any man, but she will give birth. She is given no guarantees of being understood by others. She is given no direction on how this would happen, unless you think she understood what being overshadowed by the Holy Spirit meant. She was also not given any instruction on what she needed to do. Even so, she responded “may it be done to me as according to your word” (Luke 1:38).

image courtesy from National Geographic

The Magi are some of the most mysterious men in the Bible. They came from the East following a star looking for the King of the Jews that the Jews couldn’t find. And, after escaping back to where they came, they infuriated Herod so much that he goes on a killing rampage.

Some theories about their origins and purpose in Scripture make for some interesting reading. But, whatever your take on the matter, these men of the East made an impact.

Here are several aspects of prayer that they highlight.

1. You never know what God is doing in the hearts of others. These were not the Jews. They supposedly did not have the Scripture or direct line from God. Yet they knew the time of the Messiah’s arrival. Therefore, keep praying for the lost with expectant faith. God likes to work miracles.
2. Be willing to be humble about what you think you know. The Jews thought they had the inside track with God, and these men from the East were presumably Gentiles. However they were the first to properly receive the King with royal gifts. God may surprise you. Be willing to learn new things about God.
3. You may need to detour from conventional wisdom when God gives you new direction. These men were heading right back into the waiting trap of Herod, when they listened to a dream to bypass Jerusalem and head home. Your last word from God may not be what His new word will lead you to do. Take time to allow for God to talk to you (or at least listen to your dreams).
4. GOD REWARDS THOSE THAT SEEK HIM (HEBREWS 11:6). These men obeyed God’s leading and got to worship the King.